Army efficiency

Anyone who has ever spent a period of time in the army will most probably bear witness to the fact that it is not the most efficient of organisations in the world. If anything, once that service becomes reserve duty, the efficiency is further reduced with hours if not days of time spent hanging around doing nothing during the course of a typical period of Miluim. Amongst the most important things to pack when it's that time of year are; reading material, comfortable bedding and the equipment neccessary to make coffee.

In my experience however, the army is ruthlessly efficient in one area - knowing precisely the least convenient time to call me up. So it was when my brother announced that he would be getting married in England in the summer of 2003, that I waited patiently for my draft notice which would sow panic among my Mother and future Sister in Law's family. Sure enough, the timing was precise and I found myself having to get permission from my unit to head for England. I returned two days after the wedding and was patrolling the Jordanian border by the following morning.

Ever since announcing our engagement therefore, I have been waiting to receive the dreaded envelope, informing me that I am expected to be in uniform on the day of the wedding. It came as no surprise when I received a phone call asking why I hadn't replied to a call up notice. When informed that I hadn't received the note (and I still haven't) I was unsurprised to be told that the army have done it again - with unerring accuracy, they informed me that I had training exercises the week before the wedding.

I tried to persuade my fiancee that it would be a good idea to go - a week in the open air with the boys, the opportunity to work on my tan and get some decent sleep, she can't see me anyway..... I got the look. I shut up.

Of course I'll get out of it - I've already faxed them the ishur from the Rabbanut and a copy of the invitation (could be a mistake - we don't have enough space if the unit all turns up). Until I have confirmation however, please don't mention it to my future Mother in Law....

Gilly